Thursday, January 22, 2009

Breathe, My Love

My love,
You seem so stressed today.
Breathe, my love,
Just breathe.

My love,
Your life is out of control.
Breathe, my love,
Just breathe.

My love,
The world is against you.
Breathe, my love,
Just breathe.

My love,
Your dreams are dying.
Breathe, my love,
Just breathe.

My love,
It seems like God has all but disappeared.
Breathe, my love,
Just breathe.

I can offer you nothing,
My love,
No solutions,
No super-hero tricks,
Not even any simple answers.
But I can offer you
These arms to hold you,
This mouth to kiss you,
This heart to love you
Even when you can't
Love yourself.

Just breathe, my love.
We will survive.

Monday, January 19, 2009


You torture me,
You torture me.

My hands,
Dripping with blood,
Writhing with pain,
Aching to hold you.

My feet,
Sobbing with blood,
Clutched in agony,
Desiring to run to you.

My heart,
Exploding with blood
And water,
Only to love you.

You crucified me,
You slaughtered me.
But I gladly die
For you.

I love you like a rosary

I love you like a rosary
In the sense that I want
To honor you with
The caresses of my fingers
And my soft, murmured
Prayers of praise.

I love you like a rosary
In the sense that I want
To contemplate
The mysteries of your life
The mysteries that make
You so wonderful.

I love you like a rosary
In the sense that I want
To hold you close
To my heart
And wrap you around
My wrist
And never let go.

I love you like a rosary
In the sense that I want
To see you only
When I take my last breaths
And to hold onto you
With my final strength.

If you ask me
How much I love you,
I'll tell you,
I love you like a rosary.

Friday, January 9, 2009

A few thoughts

I came to love SNL after this year. With classic lines such as, "Dope, you just got schooled, Biden-style!"and, "I propose that my opponent and I suspend our campaigns and have a three-day pie eating contest!" I was rolling off my twin bed laughing to the point I thought my lungs would give out. The election in general was an exciting time and, like V, the next day was a fifth of November that I shall never forget.

However, one of those episodes made me think. This was the episode mocking Hilary Clinton and Sarah Palin. The sad thing was, it wasn't as much the caricature as it was supposed to be. While it was very funny, it made me think about certain unacceptable issues with sexism, the media, and female politicians.

Now, I'm not a fan of either Palin or Clinton. I find them both out of touch with the issues facing most American women. Palin does not seem to understand the plight many city women or single mothers are facing in these times (but given her area, I can understand that) and Clinton just seems hell-bent on getting the Presidency and has made fun of stay-at-home mothers in the past. However, I think the media has certainly given them unfair treatment that you would never see them give a male politician.

First, there was the whole affair with Bristol Palin's pregnancy. When people found out that Bristol, at 17, was pregnant with her boyfriend's baby, they used it to attack Palin mercilessly. While I don't agree with her views on abstinence only education, I think it was extremely rude and uncouth to use her daughter, who didn't ask to be in the spotlight, as an example or to spread rumors that Sarah Palin's youngest child was, in fact, her daughter's baby. Or pointing out how "hot" she was and having people photoshopping her into bikini pictures. What does that have to do with politics? I'm not a Palin fan either, but why couldn't we focus on her naivete, lack of experience, extreme conservatism, and her investigation for political corruption instead? I think I heard more about her daughter's pregnancy, her wardrobe (especially her penchant for $150,000 suits), and her smoking hot body than is necessary to hear about, hmm, I don't know, a POLITICAL CAMPAIGN?

Second, there was the issue with Hilary running for the primaries. Again, in a time where we need a change more than ever, the last thing I wanted to see was either of the Clintons back in the White House. As for Hilary, it seemed that she cared less about the people and more about getting into power. Now, I'm sure she's probably a nice lady when you get her alone, but in the public eye, that's what she looks like. However, I was sick of hearing about what a "bitch" she was and seeing bumper stickers saying, "She couldn't satisfy her husband, she won't satisfy America." OK, what Bill Clinton did was wrong, cheating on your spouse is always wrong, but we don't know how that affected their marriage. We don't know what went on behind closed doors, apart from the obvious. And again, what does the Clinton's love life or supposed lack thereof have to do with, hmmm, I don't know, what's the word? Oh yeah, POLITICS!

The thing that aggravates me the most is that you'd never see this about a male politician. Sure, you read about their families, their scandals, etc. But you don't hear about their clothes, their inability to hold back straying spouses, or how sexy they are (seriously, when's the last time we saw one of our male politicians photoshopped for a Speedo shot?). While we certainly don't have to like or agree with a lot of what they say, we also should have the courtesy and respect to allow their private lives to remain private and instead, focus on the issues at hand and what we believe America needs.

Wednesday, January 7, 2009


I am used to always trusting people. I take things at face value and I don't usually question people when they say something outlandish. With our world as crazy as it is, nothing sounds outlandish to me. Also, I feel I should take people for their word, whatever that word may be.

Not anymore. I've been studying a lot about crime and corruption lately. Whether it's about drugs and prostitution/trafficking and their deceitful webs and ties to the mob or about domestic violence where partners once trusted each other, it all boils down to the same thing. These crimes happen because of trust, because the successful criminal is one who gets their victims to trust them. That's how poor young women and children are smuggled, how spouses can end up dead by mysterious circumstances, and how people can end up cheated.

Even in milder circumstances, this is true. How many times in my young life have I been made the butt of others' jokes, because of my past naiveté? Especially when those others are those I have called my friends? How many times have people manipulated me and lied to me, because I used to believe everything? And what about the one time where the trust I placed in a stranger nearly cost me dearly (and I will go no further with that, so don't ask me)?

I don't want to live in a world where no one trusts each other. I'm not trying to be cynical or tell people not to trust anyone. I don't want to never trust anyone. All I'm saying is, trust but be wary. Follow your gut. If your gut says don't trust, don't trust. Look carefully at character, at actions more than words. Truly evil people will play up their goodness while acting heinous. Truly good people will play up their weaknesses while acting with kindness. Project confidence and don't believe everything at face value. Most importantly, don't lose sight of who you are just because you thought you were chasing something "good".

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

My dream in life........

Every issue I'm most passionate about has to do with women. Whether it's about abortion (which I believe covers up a lot of societal issues), women's health, sexual assault, etc, I always have something to say about it. My favorite class last semester was a women's study course I took to fulfill a Gen Ed requirement (however, I chose to major in International Studies instead because I find that it will take me further than if I major in Women's Studies). Everything I end up volunteering for, whether it's participating in diaper drives for low income women or helping at our school's Breastival (for breast cancer awareness) is about something to do with my own gender.

Now, where do I see myself going with this passion? I want to fight human trafficking at all levels. I want to do it at the grassroots level and at the bureaucratic level. I want to work for organizations like Children of the Night (an organization that rescues children from street prostitution and trafficking) and hopefully end up in the UN Office of Drugs and Crime to help stop this evil. In my personal life, I want to help support organizations that aid women in empowering themselves and help cultivate a culture that gives full equality and respect to the dignity of women.

Why is this such a passionate issue for me? It is because, even in our culture, women are seen as commodities. This may sound a bit paranoid, but it is true. Women's bodies are exploited and used in advertising. Rape goes underpunished, if it is punished at all (after all, if she wore a short skirt at the time, it must speak ill of her character). Women still get paid a whopping 77 cents to every man's dollar for the same skill level in the same job. And, most disgraceful of all, sexual slavery exists in large numbers in the United States and the clients who abuse these women and children are normal people, like you and like me.

Why is this important? Because this form of slavery would not exist in this country if there was no demand for it. While slavery is illegal, many of these women are not treated as victims. They are treated as prostitutes and as women who snuck into this country willfully. They are treated as property, not only by the pimps who brought them here, but by the American clients who abuse them every day. Many of the American children who get trafficked are also treated as criminals when found. After all, they ran away from home, they got what was coming, right? They're afraid to go to the police because they fear they will be the ones who get punished. There is also the fear of retaliation, as many of these pimps threaten to kill their families (and hey, they've got their passports and identities, they could do it).

What is the bigger issue? The issue is that, even in the US, in a nation that speaks so proudly of equality, dignity, and fair treatment, we are influenced by a culture that hates women and children. We live in a culture where they are blamed and punished by society simply because they exist. We live in a culture that is influenced by the mainstreaming of pornography, where violent acts against women are presented as normal and pleasurable. We live in a culture where it's OK and acceptable for older men to joke about wanting to have sex with young teen girls and pray for the day these beautiful girls become "legal". We live in a culture where children are told to do what they're told and are treated like property (hey, they can be killed and sold while embryos and passed off from family to family for government money in the foster care system). We live in a culture where rapists and child molestors walk free and pimps get off easy.

This has got to stop. Hopefully, if we can punish this heinous crime and if we can promote a culture of true equality, respect and dignity, we can see things improve, here in the US of A and abroad. That is why I've thus dedicated my life to stopping the sex trade. Like Thomas Jefferson swore to Almighty God to free man's minds from all forms of tyrrany, I swear to Our Lord and Our Lady that I will fight to free women and children from the bondage of slavery and from the bondage of androcentric culture.

Friday, January 2, 2009

Real Beauty

There are a lot of gorgeous celebrity women out there. In their glitz and glam, they shimmer and shine. There's Angelina Jolie, Giada de Laurentiis, Natalie Portman, Jennifer Lopez, Christina Aguilera, etc. In their makeup, their million dollar dresses and hairstyles, they look like the amount of money they make every year. Men love them, women love them (and want to be them), they're considered role models.

Yet the woman I consider the most beautiful is completely unlike them. She wears no makeup (or very punky makeup) and is as far from glamourous as Mississippi is from Alaska. She's a fiery feminist and her lyrics are far from being about bubbly romance with a hunky guy. Her name is Ani Difranco. And she is the most beautiful of them all.

I consider her beautiful because she is without even trying. It's not in the graceful curve of her lips, nor the curls of her black hair, but in the confidence she projects. Whether she dyes her hair green, wears her funky nose ring and earrings or shows off her tattoo, she shows someone who is real, who is not afraid to be herself. Her lyrics and melodies are full of sincerity, of her loves, her life experiences, and of causes she cares deeply about. While she is an activist, she isn't a celeb on a soapbox, preaching to the world. She is into the work as all of us, one of the average people just trying to make a difference in the world. She doesn't fight just to fight. She wants to make the world better for all women, for her own daughter as well as the daughters of the future. She is real, having lived a tough life and is strong in who she is. For that reason, I'd have to call her the Bruce Springsteen of folk/punk-rock music.

She never wants to be the pretty girl, the "damsel in distress", the one who get saved by a knight in shining armor. She wants to be her own knight, yet share her love with her man and their daughter, as well as with those she fights for and sings about. She's been through a lot herself, yet, as a Disney flick once pointed out, "The flower that blooms in adversity is the most rare and beautiful of all."